Coercive control is a pattern of behaviour used to dominate, isolate, and control another person. In the UK, coercive control is a criminal offence under the Domestic Abuse Act 2021, and it's increasingly recognised in family court proceedings.

This guide explains what coercive control is, how it's recognised in UK family court (including PD12J guidance), and where to get support if you're experiencing it.

What is Coercive Control?

Coercive control isn't about a single incident – it's about a pattern of controlling behaviours that create an environment of fear and restriction. These behaviours can include:

• Isolation: Preventing you from seeing friends, family, or accessing support
• Monitoring: Controlling your movements, checking your phone, tracking you
• Economic abuse: Controlling money, preventing you from working, or taking control of finances
• Emotional abuse: Constant criticism, belittling, or making you doubt yourself
• Threats and intimidation: Using threats (direct or indirect) to control your behaviour
• Using children: Threatening to take children, using children to pass messages, or turning children against you
• Technology abuse: Using apps, tracking devices, or social media to monitor or control you

Coercive Control in UK Family Court

UK family courts are increasingly aware of coercive control, especially in cases involving:

• Child arrangements and contact disputes
• Applications for protective orders (non-molestation orders)
• PD12J cases (Practice Direction 12J – child arrangements and contact orders where there are allegations of domestic abuse)

PD12J Guidance

Practice Direction 12J requires courts to consider domestic abuse, including coercive control, when making decisions about children. The court should:

• Assess whether domestic abuse has occurred
• Consider the impact on the child and the parent who has experienced abuse
• Make arrangements that prioritise safety
• Consider whether contact is appropriate and how it should be supervised or managed

How Coercive Control Affects Court Proceedings

If you've experienced coercive control, it can affect:

• Child arrangements: The court may order supervised contact or restrict contact to protect you and your children
• Communication: Orders may specify how and when communication can happen
• Evidence: Patterns of coercive control can be important evidence in your case
• Support: The court may refer you to support services or recommend professional involvement

Recognising Patterns

Coercive control often follows patterns. You might notice:

• Escalation cycles: Periods of tension building, then incidents, then apparent calm before it starts again
• Repeated patterns: The same types of incidents happening in different ways
• Impact on children: Children being affected by the controlling behaviour, even if they're not directly targeted
• Isolation: Feeling cut off from support or resources

Keeping a diary of incidents can help you recognise patterns and provide evidence if needed.

Documenting Coercive Control

If you're experiencing coercive control, documentation is important. Keep records of:

• Incidents: Dates, times, what happened, who was present
• Communication: Messages, emails, notes about phone calls
• Impact: How it affected you, your children, your daily life
• Patterns: Repeated behaviours, escalation cycles, triggers

Copari's Smart Diary and Evidence Locker are designed to help you document patterns safely and securely.

Getting Support

If you're experiencing coercive control, support is available:

Immediate Safety

• 999 – In an emergency, always call the police
• National Domestic Abuse Helpline (Refuge) – 0808 2000 247 (24/7)
• Women's Aid – Live chat and local services
• Men's Advice Line – 0808 801 0327 (for male victims)

Legal Support

• National Centre for Domestic Violence (NCDV) – Free emergency injunction service
• Rights of Women – Free legal advice for women
• Family law solicitors – Look for solicitors who specialise in domestic abuse cases

Emotional Support

• Local domestic abuse services – Often provide advocacy, support groups, and counselling
• Your GP – Can refer you to mental health services
• Mind – Mental health support and information

Use Copari's support directory to find services in your area.

Working with Professionals

If you're in family court proceedings and have experienced coercive control:

• Tell your solicitor – They need to know to build your case properly
• Tell Cafcass – If Cafcass is involved, they need to understand the context
• Keep documentation – Help professionals see the patterns by keeping good records
• Access support services – Support services can provide advocacy and help you navigate the system

Understanding Your Rights

Under UK law:

• Coercive control is a criminal offence
• You can apply for a non-molestation order or occupation order
• The family court must consider domestic abuse in child arrangements
• You have the right to safety and support

Remember

Coercive control is never your fault. You deserve to be safe, and you deserve support. If you're experiencing coercive control:

• Reach out for support – you don't have to do this alone
• Keep records – documentation can help you and professionals understand what's happening
• Prioritise safety – your safety and your children's safety come first
• Access professional help – solicitors, support services, and professionals can help you navigate this

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This guide provides general information about coercive control and UK family court. It does not replace legal advice or professional support. If you're in immediate danger, call 999. For ongoing support, contact domestic abuse services or your GP.